“If I just lose 15 lbs I will finally be happy”
“If I just had abs I would be happy”
“If I can back squat 2x my body weight I will be happy”
“If I can just beat so & so in the workouts I will be happy”
Does this sound like you? I’m sure all of us at some point have had this kind of feeling. We feel if we just do xyy THEN we can be happy and content.
Of course we encourage setting goals at the gym; it helps provide clear direction, keeps you motivated and holds you accountable. And it’s awesome to have any of the goals stated above! But for some these goals stem from an extreme distaste of who they are as a person now and therefore base their entire happiness around the achievement of the goal rather than falling in love with the process.
So what can happen when they get there? For some a lot less happiness than they anticipated.
Because if you have a bad relationship with yourself no amount of lean muscle and strength is going to make you happy.
I have worked with SO many that have gotten leaner, faster & stronger and still say “This is pretty good but I just want to hit this weight” or “I just want my tummy to get a little smaller” and they get better and better and smaller and smaller but still can’t find any happiness.
At the root they still don’t like themselves for who they are.
Instead of basing your happiness around a single accomplishment, why not learn to enjoy every day of the process. Remember, we are all here for one purpose: to be healthier versions of ourselves. In order to truly do this, you have learn to love yourself for who you are NOW, not just what you could potentially be. Could you imagine if a friend told you she would like you more if you looked a little bit better in your bikini? You would probably tell said friend to… suck it.. or something of the sort. So why do you talk to yourself like that? Why do your base your opinion over your body and your performance over what your overly critical mind has to say?
This doesn’t mean you should throw out your goals or that you shouldn’t strive to be better. But learning to view yourself in a more positive light NOW will lead to a lot less stress and a lot more enjoyment over the boring every day steps it takes to get there. Because beating yourself up day in and day out over what you see in the mirror is going to make for a very long and hard journey.